2. The contest is FLASH FICTION. If you donâ€™t know what it is, this is the type of creative fiction which you can do with as little words as possible. The limit is 144 characters (including the space and periods, commas, etc) so if your limit is essentially one Tweet. Leave the entries in my comments section.
Example: Perhaps the most famous is the work by Hemmingway which goes something like: For Sale: Baby Shoes, Never Worn.. English / Filipino / Taglish entries are OK. Avoid abbreviations.
3. The theme:
ROMANTIC COMEDY Thursday â€“ Friday 11:59PM
Clock is based on the timestamp of the comments.
4. Iâ€™m choosing the winner. If there are any discrepancies with the rules whatsoever, Iâ€™ll have final say with the rules after considering the comments from readers. Winners wil be announced a couple of hours after each mini contest ends, also announcing the beginning of the new series.
5. This contest is open to everyone from the Philippines. if you live outside MLA, we will have to ship the prize to you courtesy of Nokia. They will take care of it. If you won once, you canâ€™t win again. But you can submit as many entries as you wish (you can even combine them if you want). Entries that are heavily offensive / done in bad taste / pornographic wonâ€™t be counted. PG-13 allowed.
6. If you submitted your entry in the previous post, don’t worry I am keeping track of them, but please for new entries, submit in the comments section below this post.
357 replies on “Nokia X3 Flash Fiction Mini Contest Part II: Romantic Comedy”
haha… thanks for the special mention Sir Jayvee… 😀
Thought it was scary. But yeah, it’s hilarious. Wahahaha…
Hmmmm… Time to think for the next category…
“Bangin ka ba? Kasi nahuhulog na ako sayo…”
Haha.. kanta po yan.. mag-iisip pa ako… Congrats sa winner!
Jayvee opened his cupped hand, showed it to a lady and said, “It’s my breath from when you took it away.” 😀
Hey, did you fart?? Because you blew me away!! 😀
BOY: Asan ka kagabi?
GIRL: Dito lang sa bahay, natutulog.
BOY: Kaya pala.
GIRL: Oh bakit??
BOY: Wala ka kasi sa panaginip ko e.
The prince kissed the princess very sweet.
‘On the mirror.’
The Prince wants to mary the Queen.
Para sa mahal niya, siya ay nag palayo.
Ngunit nag kita muli.
Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
‘He wants a dog’
I’m not Fred Flintstone, but I can make
When the Prince you stood in front of a mirror and show 11 horses, he would see 12.
‘The Princess notices it’
If a fat man puts you in a bag at night,
don’t worry I told Santa I wanted you
A boy gives a girl 12 roses. 12 fake, real and he says to her ” If the roses won’t die, I’ll stop loving you”
The boy wants the girl to look at his friends.
The boy shouted: Do you think she’s cute?
The girl’s left leg is Thanksgiving, and the right leg is Christmas,
The boy visits between the holidays.
The boy wishes the girl homework would be his homework.
So he can do it in the table.
The boy has a problem in the eye.
Because he can’t take it off the girl.
girl: Excuse me, I’m lost. Can you give me directions to your house?(She said to the boy)
The boy asked: Kumain ka ba ng asukal? – ang tamis kasi ng ngiti mo.
Ang lalake ay mabait. Tinuring ang babae na parang asawa.
Nang maging masama. Tinuring ang babae na parang lalake.
The boy had no other options in order to live. I want to live please I C U or U C ME(the boy said to the girl)
The boy killed himself for his girlfriend because his tired seeing her dying.
‘Actually his girlfriend was just joking’
Sign up! be a habitat of my heart
mahirap maging Magnet, lahat ng bubuyog nakadikit
“you’re the smartphone of my eyes and keypad of my fingers”
to correct previously posted:
â€œyouâ€™re the smartphone of my eyes, keypad of my fingers and promise to be your Nokia foreverâ€
I saw her. She saw me. Eyes met. Tumigil ang mundo. My moment I say. â€œBayad mo sa utangâ€?! she said.
It’s your eyes that I’ve fall for…Makes me weaker and weaker…Everyday of my life…
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart boss + smart employee =profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
To love is to know the sacrifices which eternity exacts from life.
A rich old man standing infront of a girl,
telling her, “i have lots of money!”
TWEETED: @MyFerdie I love you, but I have to leave you. Youâ€™re like a Tweet. You have no more than 140 thousand pesos in your bank account.
a couple with nothing better to do,
instead of running off under the shade of a tree,
brought out their x3, pics to be uploaded soon.
Often in silence when you are not around I sit quietly, cherishing the memories abound,I often think how life would be without You.
Girlfriend:Ayaw ko na! Iâ€™ll return to you all the things youâ€™ve given me!
Boyfriend:Okay then, letâ€™s start with the kisses! (yan ang hirit:-D)
â€œforget the past that made you cry and focus on your present that completes your life.â€
A man falls inlove through his eyes, while a woman falls inlove through her ears.
Destiny decides who you meet in life but it is your heart that decides who gets to stay forever
They say: â€œLOVE will keep us alive.â€
but why are some people committing suicide?
Maybe the truth is:
â€œToo much LOVE will kill you.â€
Ang tunay na pagmamahal ay hindi ipinapakita sa pamamagitan ng yakap at halik.
Itâ€™s not the effort that makes the girl smile.
Itâ€™s the willingness of the guy to do those crazy efforts just to make her feel special. 🙂
Ang pagmamahalan ay panandaliang kabaliwan na malulunasan ng kasalan.
have you ever found the one.
the one who makes you feel complete?
Only to lose them forever
and watch them happy with someone else
the boy asked the girl i lost my number can i have yours?
Nagsimula sa ngiti.. lumago sa halikan.. natapos sa luhaan…
Listen to your heart,
take a chance by giving in to your feelings,
its better than taking a bet on lotto…
Love at first sight is cured by the second look.
Nakikita ko ang yong mukha sa aking mga panaginip;
Kaya’t lagi akong binabangungot sa aking idlip.
Boy: para kang baraha
muka ka kaseng queen of hearts qoh.
Parang langit ang yong ngiti, ang yong mga labi, ang yong mukha, ang yong mga mata. Damn, Galing kong mambola!
My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life.
Mabait, matalino, magalang, mapagmahal, mapagpatawad. lahat na ay na sayo; kung maitatago mulang sana mukha mo.
Boy:Ulan ka ba? Kasi lupa ako. Sa ayaw at sa gusto mo, sa akin ang bagsak mo.
“Para kang alak… ang lakas ng tama mo sa akin.”
Boy loves girl. Girl loves boyâ€™s car. They marry. Boy misses girl and his car. Boy gets a dog.
Kind, intelligent, loving and hot
This describes everything you are not.
lalake: Magdala ka ng salbabida.
babae: Bakit? Maliligo ba tayo?
lalake: Hindi, baka malunod ka sa pagmamahal ko.
Ihi ka ba? …Hindi kasi kita matiis eh
Jilted Bride seeks revenge, marries Groomâ€™s dad. Dad and new wife disinherit Groom.
Hika ka ba? Kasi you take my breathe away. hehe
Dictionary kaba ? kasi binigyan mo kahulugan buhay ko eh. 🙂
You know the Greeks didn’t write obituaries.
They only asked one question after a man died;
Did he have passion?
I love you, You… you complete me, And I just…
Shut up, just shut up. You had me when you showed me your bank book!
Groom never imagined that he would meet his ex-lover in his own wedding. Ex-lover assures him, â€œDonâ€™t worry, I wonâ€™t tell my daughter.â€
Man said to his wife, “ill never met a stranger but i have been with a estranged her”
“A bird may love a fish, but where will they live?”
“Alam mo ba na pwede kitang idemanda ng trespassing? Kasi basta-basta ka na lang pumapasok sa isip ko!”:)
para kang pustiso. . . . . .
i cant smile without you 🙂
boy:laro naman tau
girl:ano namang laro?
boy:kahit ano basta wag lang taguan
boy:bc0z a girl lyk u is impossible to find
A Sweet fight
gf: ayoko na talaga! dadalhin ko na lahat ng sakin.hindi na ko babalik!
bf: hoy! babae! may nakalimutan ka!
girl:hey sasama ka ba mamaya?
boy:ay hindi ako pwede eh
girl:bakit naman.ano dahilan?
boy:magreresearch pa kasi ako kung pano ka magiging akin.
Boy: Uupo ako sa harap mo.
Boy: Titingnan mo ko at titingnan din kita
Boy: Para may pagtingin tayo sa isat-isa.
sana letter T nlang ako para always next to U
mraming klase ng view…
pero sa dnami dmi ng view..
ang paborito ko ay…
I LOVE VIEW 🙂
Never go to but whenever you are mad with each other;
Stay up and fight!
Never go to bed whenever you are mad with each other;
Stay up and fight!
boy:call her miss,nkalimutan ko name mo.
can i just call you MINE?
girl:no,im sorry!datz not my name.
RUSH SALE: workaholic boyfriend- in good working condition, without hidden defects!
Parang puro galing lahat sa sms, mga forwarded messages. Madami ako nun but I wont post it here, di naman akin yun.
Kung labag sa loob mo ang magmukhang bobo, hindi ka nararapat magmahal.
She’s walking on the hallway. The eyes, smile and her total physical aura are so lovely. But there is more to her than her beauty. The Nokia X3!
I’ve always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. And now that I met you, I changed my mind.
If you can’t live without me, why aren’t you dead yet?!
As the days go by, I feel so lucky that you’re not here to ruin it for me.
When we’re together, you’ve always told me that you would die for me. Now that we;re no longer together, how about keeping your promise?!
Watched Naruto. Bought a guitar. Ate fishballs. Went to a car show… with my wife with me – and I am happier!
I control you, youre mine to do as i like,
you move, you speaks,
and its me who talks.
Happiness isn’t happiness without a violin-playing goat
Boy’s 1st day at work
Boy meets girl inside an elevator
Boy flirts with Girl
Girl turns out to be boy’s boss
mouth wont shut, words would not stop,
I turn away..turn on my computer,
and started reading a bugged life.
I hate everything about you, every thing,
but mostly, i hate the way i dont hate you,
not even a lot, not even close, not even at all.
two souls fall in love. one’s a vegetarian the other one’s a butcher
steve’s beautiful fiancee suddenly turns into a 70 year old man on the day of their wedding. The only way to turn her back was true loves’ kiss
marry me and i will let you hold the remote control forever.
Our love has a chemistry; since she treats me like a toxic waste.
jacob to edward: let’s face it, i’m hotter than you =)
Ana and Jim had recently split up. Ana tried to look for love online. She then fell in love with a guy named Chatter76 who turns out to be Jim.
â€œDoes my being half-naked bother you?â€
â€” Jacob Black
Amo 1: Inday ano gamit mo sa katawan? Ang kinis mo kasi eh.
Amo 2: Siguro gumagamit ka ng papayaâ€¦
Ama 1: Baka naman kalamansi?
Inday: NO! â€¦. ONLY BELO TOUCHES MY SKIN, WHO TOUCHES YOURS?
Amo 1 and 2:(tumbling)
â€œI offered eternal servitude, remember. Iâ€™m your slave for life.â€
â€” Jacob Black
A manâ€™s proposing to his girl put the ring in a cake, the girl ate the cake and didnâ€™t notice the ring. She said the almond nuts are so yummy!
There is only one thing I want to speed up, and the rest can wait foreverâ€¦ but for that, itâ€™s true, your impatient human hormones are my most powerful ally at this point.
-Edward Cullen, Eclipse
Edward Cullen: (to Jacob) If we werenâ€™t natural enemies, and you werenâ€™t trying to steal my reason for existing, I might like you.
B:Flowers for you and chocolates too! Kasi mahal kita.
G:(smiles sweetly) Thank you!
B:Hayaan mo, bukas diamante naman nanakawin ko. =)
mahal kita kahit muka ka pang bangkay.
A girl was drowned in a pool, when a man came and threw a life vest. She believe he was a Knight in shining armor until â€œThatâ€™s P15/hourâ€ ok!
GIRL: Miss mo ba ako?
BOY: Sa ngayon “miss” palang kita, sa susunod “misis” na kita.
Clumsy girl. Lucky Boy. Banana. Cue Dave Matthews.
Clumsy girl. Lucky boy. Banana peel. Cue Dave Matthews.
Sa isang klase, boy: tumataba ka at bumibilog. girl: weh di nga? boy: at nagiging mundo ko.
kasabay ng tawa ang bawat halinghing, at kasabay ng ungol ang bawat ngiti.
kapag may romansa may ligaya.
“Hi good sir, my name is Jared. Uhm, me and your daughter…”
After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.” She replied, “Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice.”
The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, “I’ve found a man just like father!” Her mother replied, “So what do you want from me, sympathy?”
Q: What is a wedding tragedy?
A: To marry a man for love, and then find out he has no money.
Tapos ka na ba sa exam mo? Sana ako naman sagutin mo.
Encyclopedia ka ba? Ang kapal mo kasi.
Minsan gusto kitang patirin, para mahulog ka naman sa akin.
Boy meets girl. Girl likes boy, boy likes another boy.
Girl: Gusto kong ikasal sa malaking simbahan at may magandang reception. Ikaw, saan mo gusto?
Boy: Sa tabi mo.
Once upon a time:
Boy: Pupu ka ba?
Girl: Hindi ah! Bakit?
Boy: Kasi hindi kita kayang paglaruan eh.
you’ll never know what love is,but not until you fell in love with me.
Esquinitas: Lovers’ Best Hideout
A blind man’s words to his lover: LOVE is BLIND. So Love me.
you complete me..=D
Q:”Are you ready?”
A:”As I’ll ever be”.
Once upon a time:
BOY: Sana wrinkles na lang kita.
GIRL: Bakit naman?
BOY: Para kasama kita hanggang sa pagtanda ko. 🙂
The most powerful symptom of love is MENTAL DISTURBANCE.
Result: MENTAL HOSPITAL.hehe
Mr. Death falls in love, gives up his job, goes to earth and pays for a major makeover. Girl dies the next day.
Ako’y sa’yo at Ikaw ay akin lamang.
boy: hindi kaba napapagud?
boy: kanina kapa kasi tumatakbo sa isipan ko.
sana isda ka at tubig ako para sa ayaw at gusto mo hindi ka mabubuhay ng wala ako.
At a party, the Prince was smitten by a lady disguised as a gypsy. They made out. The next day, the jester was executed. He was the gypsy.
The most sensitive part you can touch on a woman that will drive her crazy.Her heart.(hmm.mga green minded jan.ehe)
Ana sliced the cake and found a ring. She rushed to Jim’s side & hugged him. He hugged her back & mouthed at the waiter,”Wrong girlfriend!”
boy: parol kba?
boy: kse all these years ikaw pa rin ang nksabit sa puso ko..
boy: candy cane ka ba?
girl: bakit naman?
boy: kasi pag nakikita kita, i always want to lick you
boy: anong gagawin mo this christmas?
girl: wala naman. party lng. ikaw?
boy: ganun pa rin.
I love you just the way you are!
Groom was dismayed to meet his ex-lover at his own wedding. The brideâ€™s father said to him: â€œAnna understands. On weekends, youâ€™re mine.â€
The princess married the court jester. They had a son. They named him Joker.
Man and woman got married. A year after, they divorced. Then, woman gave birth and sued man for alimony. Man had a stroke.
Know what? I love my bf even though he refuses to commit to a hamper and putting down the toilet seat and lid at least for once in my life.
lifeis.oceanbliss at gmail dot com
â€œOur love will last forever, in this life and beyond,â€ boy and girl swore to each other. The next day, they broke up.
Pakipatay na ang ilaw, Babe!! ready na ako! babe pag pinatay ko ang ilaw makikita pa kaya kita?
Ana sliced the cake and found a ring. She rushed to Jimâ€™s side & hugged him. He hugged her back & mouthed at the waiter,”Wrong girlfriend!”
B:Excuse me can I borrow a phone, it is an emergency?
G:Yea sure whats wrong?
B:My mom told me to give her a call the first time I fell in love.
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk past you again?
You: You look like my second wife!
Other: How many times have you been married?
If I followed you home, would you keep me?
Baby you must be tired because you’ve been running through my mind all night!
You dropped your smile; can I pick it up for you?
I’m a thief, and I’m here to steal your heart.
I wish I were a tear so I could start in your eyes, live on your face, and die on your lips.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.
When God made you he had to have broken the mold because I have never seen anything as beautiful as you.
Uy papicture tayo!!
para ma-develop tayo!! 🙂
Can i take your picture??
coz i want to show Santa exactly what i want for Christmas!!
Pinaglihi ka ba sa keyboard??
kasi type kita..
Yesterday ended my PMS. Today I miss cuddling with him. Tomorrow starts my menopause. Whoever said love is endless, doesn’t study Biology.
lifeis.oceanbliss at gmail dot com
hon: miss na kita!
hon2: miss mo na ako?
hon: HINDI! kaya nga miss diba!
Tweeter ka ba? bakit? lagi kasi kitang fina-follow eh!
Para kang “LUPANG HINIRANG”. Napapatigil kasi ako pag narinig kita. At hindi lang yun! Napapahawak pa ako sa puso ko!
I love you once, I love you twice! should we go to bed now?!
“TAE” ka ba? Kasi hindi kita kayang paglaruan.
Are you an ASTHMA? ‘Cause you take my breath away.
You’re my paint because you give color to my life.
Mark this day!I’ll propose tonight and will marry you someday!
Mukha ka mang “dagis palengke”, may baygon rat trap naman ako para manatili kana sa bahay ko.
Have we met? ’cause you look familiar. You look like my NEXT BOYFRIEND.
I don’t need to look at the sky to see stars because my star is just the one reading this.
I love you Faithfully!
Ganun? ok spell “Faithfully”!
pwedeng sincere na lang?
The love of a man depends on how he care for his relation
ang tanong! ikaw ba ay may ka-relasyon?
Want some money? Kuha ka ng 3M.
Bakit ka mag-aasawa?Eh di mu naman kadugo o kaano-ano ang papakainin mo habang buhay..hehe =)
What does a man / woman want?
LOVE is a small word that has a lot of meaning behind it.
She tried to slap me, slipped, and hit her head. When she came to, she said she wanted to have my baby. I should have tried to catch her.
B: Ms., wonder girls ka ba?
G: No. Why?
B: ‘Cause I want nobody, nobody but you.
Wanted: Bachelors for LOLA (may asim pa)
Girl asked boy,”how much do you love me?” boy replied,”its like a phone… I love you X 3 (times three) – love love love much!” 🙂
I was in McDo Katipunan.
He was in McDo Batangas.
Phones at hand.
A pair of Cheeseburgers and Caramel Sundaes.
Posporo ka ba? Edi posporo rin ako para MATCH tayo.
Hindi lahat ng buhay ay buhay. Tignan mo ako, buhay pero patay na patay saâ€™yo.
When I see your face..
Mukhang basag na flower vase.
Papupulis kita. Kasi ninakaw mo yung puso ko.
If he ever asks “Where’s the F5 button on your vagina?” Well, you need a new boyfriend.
01: You + Me = Forever;
02: goto 01
Wag kang maniwala sa mga sabi-sabi mahal. I never left you. Uulitin ko. Hindi kita KINALIWA!
3 Phases of Love: Engagement Ring. Wedding Ring. Suffering.
Eh paano?! Ang napansin ko ay hindi ang kanyang magandang kutis o mga mata…masakit mang isipin, ang una kong napansin ay ang kanyang tinga!
I know that you want to be seated at that table when we date. I bought it so that we donâ€™t have to go back to that fancy restaurant anymore.
LOST AND FOUND: 43 year old male high school crush who lost his memory. I find him still sexy so I brought him home. Get him back tomorrow.
Pustiso ka ba? Kasi you know I can’t smile without you. =)
Magsalbabida ka nga. Baka kasi malunod ka sa pag-ibig ko.
Maglalagas man ang buhok mo, tatalsik man ang pustiso mo, wawalisin ito ng puso ko
Kulangot ka ba? “cause you are really really hard to get.
She whispered “GOOD NIGHT CRUSH!”, he said “shhhh! you might wake the kids up…”
Labs na labs parin kita kahit bungi bungi kana, para sakin ikaw ang pinakapoging papa, o kaâ€™y sarap isiping kasama kang tumanda
kung ikaw ang makakalaban ko sa karera..
pede bang maglakad na lang tayo?
bakit pa ko tatakbo, e kasama ko na premyo ko?! 🙂
The guy ran into the house.
There is a grenade which is about to explode!
Then he shouted, “But darling, I’d still catch a grenade for you!”
Search. Add. Confirm. Poke. Poke. Poke. They changed relationship status. Engaged. Married. Guy forgot to send gifts on Farmville. Single.
They met. They look into each otherâ€™s eyes.
And POOF, they became Koko Krunch!
â€œHey, howâ€™s your lovelife?â€
Tombstone text written by the departedâ€™s wife: HEAR LAYS A MEN DEAD AFTER DONATING THE BREIN TO HER BELOBED WIFE HU SUFERD BREIN TUMORS.
Guy1: Pare, tanda mo na la ka paring GF. Wala kabang napupusuan?
Gu2y: Pare, manhid ka lng…manhid ka lng.
Guwapo + Maganda = Perfect Couple
Guwapo + Panget = True Love
Panget + Maganda = Galing Dumiskarte
Panget + Panget = SUKOB!
GF: Honey, do you think I’m pretty or ugly?
BF: For me, you’re PRETTY UGLY. Love is blind though. =)
Husband (Dying): I love you and I’m sorry I’ve cheated you.
Wife: I know. That’s why I poisoned you.
Happy 50th anniversary dear. Hereâ€™s to years of regular fighting and drunken living; looking forward to more fights and wines. Cheers!
ROMANTIC COMEDY #1: He likes men. She likes women. A match made in heaven.
ROMANTIC COMEDY #2: They had a baby. They got married. They fell in love.
ROMANTIC COMEDY #3: He’s 6’2″. She’s 5’2″. Horizontally, it doesn’t really count.
What men meant:
-Can I help with dinner? (Food isn’t ready yet?)
-That’s interesting, dear. (Still talking?)
-Oh! How bad my memory is! (I forgot)
A man in Hell asked Devil:
Can I make a call to my Wife?
After making call he asked how much to pay.
Devil : Nothing, Hell to hell is Free.
ROMANTIC COMEDY #4: He’s an obituary writer. She writes epitaphs. A match made in heaven. Or hell.
Wife. Crossword help cry. â€œ8-letter word for â€˜tiresome samenessâ€™”.
Husband. Answer. â€œMonogamyâ€. Wink Wink.
Husband whispered lovingly to his wife, “You’re a good investment. Before we married, my hands could reach around you. Now…”.
Wag kang feeling. Hindi lahat ng pinopost ko ay para sayo…
YUNG IBA LANG 🙂
Two friends talking.
F1: Bakit ganun ang sakit sakit Tol? Iniwan niya lang ako.
F2: Bakit? Saan ba dapat kayo pupunta?
Kahit madaming tao sa mundo, kung mahal mo siya, di ka talaga maiinlove sa iba. Maliban na lang kung malandi ka.
It’s Walt Disney’s fault kung bakit may “happily ever after”. ^_^
“You have eyes like stars, lips like candies, cheeks like cherries and skin like butter.”
Wait, don’t smile. Imagine how you look like.
Ang taong gusto mo, parang ice cream. Matutunaw lang kapag tinitigan mo. Kaya kung ako sayo, dilaan mo na habang maaga pa.
Ayoko ng katulad mo. Dahil ang gusto ko ay “Ikaw Mismo”.
Are you a criminal? Wanted ka kasi sa puso ko eh.
B: Break na tayo!
G: (umiiyak) Bakit? Hindi mo na ba ako mahal?
B: Gaga. Break na tayo, kain tayo, nagugutom na ako eh! Syempre tayo pa! 🙂
Ang pag ibig ko sayo ay parang RUGBY..
Matagal matanggal.. At higit sa lahat, nakaka-HIGH :”>
BOY: Sana naging simbang gabi nalang ako…
BOY: Para kahit papano ku-kumpletuhin mo ako.
Kung pangalan ko ay I LOVE YOU. Maglalakas loob ka bang tawagin ako?.
What if my name is “YOURS”? How will I introduce myself to you? Should I say, hi, i’m Yours.
Gusto ko sanang maging anghel sayo kaso, katawan mo pa lang,
dinedemonyo na ko!.
Ini-small ka ba nila? Wag kang mag-alala. Ini-iBIG naman kita.
Anong sabi ng baboy na nililitson?
“Just gonna stand there and watch me burn, but that all right because I like the way it hurts”.
B:Miss, Holdaper ka ba?
B:Ibibigay ko kasi ang lahat sayo wag mo lang ako saktan.
G: Miss mo na ba ako?
B: Sa ngayon, miss na kita. Balang araw, MISIS na kita.
Mahal pa rin kita kahit ang hirap hirap mong intindihin!
– Para ito kay LYAN BANG!
Pag nakikita kita, para akong mapapa-ihi. Kinikilig kasi ako.
Banat ng mga Singles: May AIDS ako! (Acute Irritable Detached Syndrome)
G: Aanhin mo yung hagdan?
B: Aakyat sana ako sayo ng ligaw
G: Yumuko ka na lang.
G: Pakipulot ung puso ko, nahulog na kasi sayo!
This is how to greet your ex on Christmas and New Year.
“Maligayang PAST-ko” at “May bagong ka-ON na ko”.
People who are known as shrimps: Katawan lang ang gusto niyo sa’min!
Girl: If I would give you a chance to kiss me, where would you want it to be?
Boy: Inside the CHURCH in front of JESUS.
Sana KALENDARYO ka na lang, para ARAW ARAW , ikaw ang DATE ko.
Know the myths b4 anything else.
Pwede ba kitang sundan?
Sabi kase ng nanay ko “follow your dreams” eh.
Kahit gaano pa karami ang inumin kong ENERVON, kung hindi naman kita makikita, hindi ko rin maaabot ang “HAPPINESS” ko.
NIDO ka ba? Kasi you’re my number one!
Kaya mo ba akong murahin? Kasi kun hindi, mahalin mo na lang ako.
Magaling ako magSHOOT sa basketball. Pero ewan ko nga ba, ikaw lang ang namiMISS ko.
Ganyan ka nman eh, lalapit ka lng sa’kin pag hndi mo na kaya!
– NAG-IINARTENG CHARGER
Google kaba? kasi lahat nang hinahanap ko nakikita ko sa iyo.
Lighter ka ba? Nagliyab kasi yung puso ko nung mahawakan kita.
B: Uy, balita ko, MMDA ka ah?
G: Ha? MMDA?
B: Oo, Mahal Mo Daw Ako.
MATH GEEK Lovers exchange notes:
I L O V E U
We met. He fixed my shoe; we fell in love. I could care less about his gold.
Those 3 words are pointy. Tagos sa laman, sagad sa buto. OUCH or rather, SWEET?
First Step in Wooing- For Dummies.
Hair loss, very tired, withered: Signs of Having a Menace Partner
Love and War. Two inseparable words.
Architecture- Foundation is relationship. The stronger it is, the longer it will last.
Anong height mo? Pa’no ka nagkasya sa puso ko?
Ang buhay ko ay parang seesaw. Pag wala ka, down ako.
Sana naka-off ang ilaw, para tayo nalang mag-on.
Album ka ba? Kasi single ako.
Faithful man doesn’t deceive, unfaithful woman flirts. A.K.A Poker face. Lady gaga.
I forgot your name. Can I call you mine?
Pustiso ka ba? – kasi I can’t smile without you
May butas ba yang puso mo? Natrap kasi ako, can’t find my way out.
Uy papicture tayo para ma-develop tayo!
Uy, question? Can you recommend a good banker where I can make a deposit? Coz I’m planning to save all my love for you.
Naku. Watch your post po, may mga entry na nauulit. Wala po sanang gayahan. 🙂
Police ka ba?? kasi hinuli at ikinulong mo ang puso ko.
ahmm dont worry hindi sila nanggagaya hindi lang nila alam na meron ng ganung entry, masyado madami yung entries to read kaya pabayaan mo na, siguro naman First Come First Serve ang isang rules d2
hangin ka ba? kasi hindi ko kayang mabuhay ng wala ka.
Why is your face all scratched ?
My girlfriend said it with flowers.
Not really, she hit me round the head with a bunch of thorny roses !
What happened to that couple who met in a revolving door ?
They’re still going round together !
My brother fell in love with his wife the second time he met her.
He didn’t know how rich she was the first time !
Would you love me if I were a TV star ?
No, but I could switch you off !
If Miss Piggy married Mr Back she’d be Piggy Back. 🙂
Why aren’t you going to marry David after all?
Well he said he’d die if I didn’t, so thought I’d wait and see!
I’ll cook you dinner, what would you like ?
A life insurance policy !
Sana exam na lang ako..
Para sagutin mo ko agad. 🙂
You’re quite a catch! But don’t feel too bad -even good offers sometimes have a catch! 🙂
Just always remember that my heart only beats for you.
Wag kang matatakot
kung kulay pula
na yung dingding
at kisame mo
Wala ka sa impyerno
andito ka sa PUSO ko! 🙂
..dadaan pa ba ko jan sa inyo?
o didiretso na ko sa PUSO mo?! haha.. 🙂
may nahalata ako sa crush ko..
sa totoo lang, cute naman siya at mabait pa,
kaso may kulang talaga sa kanya eh..
hmmmm.. AKO! 🙂
Si lalaki ay gasolina at si babae ay pamasahe.
My heart is whispering in me telling me to be your only one.
Now I know you love another and its hard for me to get over, even though we’re not together, my heart loves you.
At the first time I saw you, I was afraid to fall in love with you, but now that I love you, I am afraid to lose you.
Nawala ang ngiti ng lalake nang tuluyang natanggal ang damit pangkasal at nakita ang isang bagay na dapat ay wala sa isang babae…
If you come back to me, I promise you I would never let another day just pass us by.
Mayaman. Matalino. Galing sa magandang pamilya. At higit sa lahat, mabait at understanding. Tapos tatanggihan mo lang dahil mabaho ang paa?!
I’ve lost you and I’m regretting all I’ve done, but always remember that I’m with you all along.
SLAP. They kissed. SLAP.
Whatever it takes, I’ll make your darkest day so bright.
If ever you cry just know I’m in your heart.
If you go away, I will wait for you, but whenever you call I swear I will be there.
The girl yelled, “Yes! Kami na! Sa panahon ngayon, mahirap ng makahanap ng lalaking wala ka ng kaagaw.”
He’d never been on a plane, she was afraid of heights; it was love at first flight.
On the first day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me…
Nothing! Because I am single!
bakit kaya ganun? ang liit naman nang kamay mo pero hawak mo ang mundo ko?
patatawanin kita pag hindi ka masaya, bubuhatin kita pag nirayuma kana, o kay sarap isiping kasama kang tumanda.
Love at first sight. Second, third, fourth… Wait someone’s coming! Okay. Fifth, sixth….
May farmville ka ba? Pati kasi puso ko, na-harvest mo na.
What is gravity for? Kung sa’yo lang ay nahuhulog na ako?
Diabetic ka ba?Kasi iâ€™m planning to be the sweetest person for you.
Nagbago na ang Zodiac Signs. Pero di pa rin kayo compatible.
Bar. Woman entered. Man noticed. Eyes met. Smiles exchanged. Held hands. Sweet nothings. Room. Passion burning. That would P5000, woman said.
The best accident that happened to me is when I’ve fallen for you.
Alam mo ba kung bakit tinalikuran ko ang dota para sayo? Kasi ang dota kaya kong paglaruan, pero ikaw hindi.
DEL MONTE ka ba? Kasi we’re Fit and Right.
Ayaw kong binobola ka. Baka kasi tumalbog ka at masalo ka ng iba.
Ibibigay ko sayo ang SSS at PhilHealth ko. Basta sa akin ang PAG-IBIG mo.
B: Idedelete na kita sa friendster!
G: Bakit naman?
B: Kasi ayaw ko ng friends lang tayo eh! 🙂
It’s true that first love never dies, but true love can bury it alive.
She fell right into the cake while I was having my afternoon tea. It was then I saw the only thing missing in the bland taste of my life.
She was about to kiss the floor. Mr. Grumpy hesitantly saved her. 2 years after, its Mr and Mrs Grumpy.
Feel my word, and fall in love!
Hold my hand he asked, â€œno, its sweaty!â€. minutes later I grabbed his hand â€œeven if your sweat will drown me this is all worth it.â€
â€œwhy are you such a tomboy?! You act so manly!â€ Then I kissed the living daylights out of him to shut him up and the rest was magic.
It was raining and suddenly they fall in love!
Though your snore can wake the dead, I don’t want to sleep with anyone else. (Then again, will I ever get any sleep at all?)
I love you more than potato chipsâ€”but there are times when I wish you also came in Cheese.
Until death do us part…but if not at the same time, then me first.
The worst pick-up line to say to an insomniac: “Sleep with me.”
“Happy ending” is an oxymoron…butâ€”what the heckâ€”let’s go for it.
B: Aabsent na ako sa lahat ng klase ko.
G: Bakit naman?
B: Para makapasok ako sa puso mo. 🙂
An insomniac marries a sleepyhead. She’s always agitated and he’s often yawning. Their bed sees a lot of action, but not the kind they want.
B: Hoy bukas sisingilin na kita ng renta ha!
G: Bakit naman?
B: Kasi matagal ka ng nakatira sa puso ko eh. 🙂
“You’re the sugar in my coffee,” she told him. “Sweetheart,” he said, “I’m flattered, but I’m diabetic.”
“Is it true that he dropped you like a hot potato?” her friends asked. She replied, “Yes…but put the emphasis on ‘hot.'”
B: May kilala ka bang gumagawa ng relo?
G: Madami. Bakit?
B: May sira yata relo ko. Pag ikaw kasi kasama ko, humihinto ang oras ko. 🙂
B: Mabilis ka siguro sa mga puzzles no?
G: Medyo. Bakit?
B: Kasi kakasimula pa lang ng araw ko nabuo mo na. 🙂
she is blind.. he is deaf…
she says he is handsome.
then, he says thanks.
Showgirl1 saw her boyfriend with showgirl2. An hour later: boyfriend had broken bones; showgirl 2 needed a cosmetic surgeon.
B: Kapag ako may tindahan, lahat ng tao bebentahan ko ng mura, sayo lang hindi.
G: Bakit naman?
B: Dahil sayo lang ako magmamahal. 🙂
Girl:Alam mo para kang bisyo.
Boy:(kilig) Dahl di mo ko maiwasan?
Girl:Di noh! Dahil sinisira mo buhay ko..!
Though you’re someone in this world that I’ll always choose to love, from now on you’re only someone that I used to love…from now on you’re only someone that I love to use!
Our chicken lay 9 eggs! how many can you give me?
I’m in great pain, just a sign that you’re with me gives me the strength to hold on.
Husband: When we’re old, I wish you would die ahead of me, ’cause if I die first, I can’t stand the thought of you being left alone and lonely.
Wife: That is so sweet! But I wish that you die first so I can spend your insurance and have a vacation!
Lagi mo nalang akong binubulag sa iyong kagandahan, kakainis ka!
Love for sale. No exchange, no return.
Eve: Tell me one good reason why I should marry you!
Adam: There is no one else!
Get back my Hon! Dead or Alive!
I want my wife! Dead or Alive!
I keep falling in love, but love keeps stepping aside!
Gusto ko man mawala sa iyong paningin pero you got me wrapped around you.
Man: If I give you all the riches in the world, would you marry me?
Woman: No. Unless you give yourself, too!
Sa totoo lang hindi ako naniniwala sa fate, pero nung dumating ka sa buhay ko nabago lahat ng pananaw ko.
Tucked under the sheets, guy & wife caresses each other, eyes filled with love & lust. Moment is building up. Suddenly, prrffftttt. Bed empty.
You’re the only one who taught my heart, a sense I never knew I had.
Heroine ka ba?? para kasi akong nasa langit kapag kasama kita.
Patapon na ang buhay ko ngunit nagkaroon ako ng reason na magsimula ng panibago at ikaw yung reason na yun.
If you cry, I’ll be the one who will catches all your tears.
with all my problems, you will be my medication.
hi JP! your last entry won’t be counted na since it was recorded at 12:01. =)
hahaha ok lang po, mukhang mahihirapan ka magjudge nan kuya Jayvee dami entry
End. Goodluck to everyone! 🙂
–A lady took a widower’s daughter. He mourns again. Whose body?
–The postman rings thrice. No letters. Blank stares.
–Snow white won’t wake up. Final curtain.
–I traveled to the future. No one’s there.
–The wedding bells stopped tolling. Rose petals, gone with the wind.
–A poor lad eloped with a rich girl. He finally came home. No house. Arson
–A Philosophy book. A broken rosary. Emmanuel’s stuffs.
— An extravagant wedding. Then, children at the couple’s doorsteps.
–A friar weeps at the sight of his daughter entering the convent.
–Dad’s illness. Mom’s indifference. Ted’s bruises.
–Epitaph: He served to the king. Gone in a landlord’s whim.
–For Printing: A 16-yrs old’s Curriculum vitae.
it’s not yet quarter to 12 🙂 goodluck
Current local time: 11:41:24 pm
Date: Sunday 16 January 2011
Time zone: PHT (Philippines Time)
Current time zone offset: +08:00 hours