The Best Press Conference I Have Ever Attended

I have never been so enthralled to sit among scientists from CERN. Likewise I have never seen Powerpoint slides that discussed matters of importance, turning all other worldly man-made events into trivial things. The Powerpoint presentation I witnessed was showing the history of the universe, the concept of the time-space continuum, and folding space.

It seems that the Department of Science and Technology has finally made contact with CERN, the center of all scientific research in the world. CERN. What’s that?

In layman terms, CERN is the brothel of physics, where you will find a lot of banging.

Particle banging to be exact. In Geneva.

CERN houses the Large Hadron Collider, the biggest particle accelerator known to man. If the world comes to an end, it won’t be surprising that the source of destruction will have to do with the LHC.

CERN is the source of all evil, as Dan Brown writes in Angels and Demons. When asked to comment, the two physicists nonchalantly answered that CERN is seen as evil because of its production of anti-matter. The collision of matter with anti-matter is often used as a dump explanation for the powering of Star ships, as is seen in the Star Trek series. However, a CERN scientist was actually quoted to say that if we were to combine all the anti-matter we’ve ever produced and inject it with matter, the total output energy would only equal enough to power a light bulb (source). Dan Brown is wrong.

CERN is the Mecca of Physics. More than half of the world’s physicists have made a pilgrimage to Geneva to conduct experiments. The LHC’s purpose is to prove the existence of the Higgs Boson.

In truth, I prepared all night to ask one question alone. My question was “the LHC was built for the discovery of the Higgs Boson. What is the progress of this discovery and what are the implications to mankind?”

I got an (paraphrased) answer. “You are correct. The LHC’s primary reason for existence is for the Higgs Boson particle. It has not yet been discovered. The discovery of the Higgs doesn’t have one true value but its implications are great. It is like how the electron was discovered about 100 years ago — the advances that were made to society were immense.”

The Higgs Boson’s discovery will help explain the origins of mass.

CERN is here to work together with the DOST to find opportunities where synergies can be made. Finally.